Achievements Unlocked
Don't worry, metagaming is all that matters.

Blood-Drunk Miners Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Bosses Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Bubblegums Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Hardcore random points
Well, I might be a blind, deaf, crippled guy, but hey, at least I'm alive.

Hierophants Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Intento Score
A blast from the future?

Maintenance Pills Consumed
Wait why?

Style Score
You might not be a robot, but you were damn close.

Tourists Served as Bartender Highscore
Your highscore on serving tourist bots as bartender.

Blood-drunk Miner Killer
I guess he couldn't handle his drink that well.

Boss Killer
You've come a long ways from asking how to switch hands.

Bubblegum Killer
I guess he wasn't made of candy after all

Centcom Grade: Acceptable Service
Well, it'll do! You and your department did just fine.

Centcom Grade: Shitty Service
Well, you at least tried. How about trying harder?

Clickbait
Where's my free smartphone?!?

Getting an upgrade
Make your first unique material item!

Hierophant Killer
Hierophant, but not triumphant.

How Do I Switch Hands???
If you saw someone casually club themselves upside the head with a toolbox anywhere in the galaxy but here, you'd probably be pretty concerned for them.

Long shift
Well, that didn't take long.