Bosses Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Bubblegums Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Tourists Served as Bartender Highscore
Your highscore on serving tourist bots as bartender.

Boss Killer
You've come a long ways from asking how to switch hands.

Bubblegum Killer
I guess he wasn't made of candy after all

Centcom Grade: Shitty Service
Well, you at least tried. How about trying harder?

Clickbait
Where's my free smartphone?!?

Getting an upgrade
Make your first unique material item!

How Do I Switch Hands???
If you saw someone casually club themselves upside the head with a toolbox anywhere in the galaxy but here, you'd probably be pretty concerned for them.

KKKiiilll mmmeee
You were a little too ambitious, but hey, I guess you're still alive?