Achievements Unlocked
Don't worry, metagaming is all that matters.

Bosses Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Bubblegums Killed
You've killed HOW many?

Fish Species Caught
How many different species of fish you've caught so far. Gotta fish 'em all.

Hardcore random points
Well, I might be a blind, deaf, crippled guy, but hey, at least I'm alive.

Maintenance Pills Consumed
Wait why?

Assistant Victory
If you got killed instead of someone more important, you just flexed the true strength of your """"role"""".

Boss Killer
You've come a long ways from asking how to switch hands.

Bubblegum Killer
I guess he wasn't made of candy after all

Clickbait
Where's my free smartphone?!?

God's Wrath
Did you think you could get away with defiling the word of God?

HA, GOTTEM
Made you look!

How Do I Switch Hands???
If you saw someone casually club themselves upside the head with a toolbox anywhere in the galaxy but here, you'd probably be pretty concerned for them.

I Was a Teenage Anarchist
You were doing a great job sticking it to the system until that vending machine decided to fight back.

Long shift
Well, that didn't take long.

Look Out, Sir!
Either awarded for making the ultimate sacrifice for your comrades, or a really dumb attempt at grenade jumping.

Rule 8
Call an admin this is ILLEGAL!!