shuttle_reason from 210078 on Sybil
The Emergency Shuttle Has Been Called!
  • Chang is in distress
  • reality is breaking down
  • Would you like a tutorial on killing the president
  • This message has been automatically generated based upon readings from long range diagnostic tools. To assure the quality of your request every finalized report is reviewed by an on-call rear admiral. Rear Admiral’s Notes: Next invalid call will be punished.
  • Hello this is super awesome captain uh. Tarrier Von Barsh. I am here to tell you Central Command we are having a maximum grade threat. We have wizard operatives who have also harnessed the power of blobs and xenos as well as pirates and bioviruses! Our supermatter is also a singulo! We must ensure the safety of your interns so we will have to wall off any visits! We are very sorry to tell you this!
  • Local botanist smokes omega weed a little too hard, station is depressurizing, &c.
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